Theology Shapes Marriage: How does the Bible’s doctrine of sin help us have a more godly marriage?

Establish the need: People often have romanticize vision of marriage that’s picture perfect for Instagram, Facebook and Twitter. People airbrush the most obvious reality of our life: sin.  Have you thought about sins and marriage?

Purpose: Explore how theology shapes marriage and here in our first series we shall consider how does the Bible’s doctrine of sin help us have a more godly marriage, by first looking at the Biblical teaching on sin and then explore some implications.

1. Biblical Teaching:
   1. Truth #1: Everyone is a sinner (Romans 3:23)
   2. Truth #2: Sin has affected every faculty of the sinner
      1. Man’s mind is hostile towards God: “7 because the mind set on the flesh is hostile toward God; for it does not subject itself to the law of God, for it is not even able to do so, 8 and those who are in the flesh cannot please God.” (Romans 8:7-8)
         1. Notice the mind is “hostile toward God”
         2. It does not desire to “subject itself to the law of God”
      2. Man’s sinful behavior gives him an ulterior motivation not to seek God: “For everyone who does evil hates the Light, and does not come to the Light for fear that his deeds will be exposed.” (John 3:20)
         1. Note the connection between one’s sinful behavior and how they feel towards God and Christ: “everyone who does evil hates the Light”
         2. Note the reason why people with sinful behavior does not want to seek God: Such an individual “does not come to the Light for fear that his deeds will be exposed.”
      3. Man’s will is hostile towards God: “For the wrath of God is revealed from heaven against all ungodliness and unrighteousness of men who suppress the truth [l]in unrighteousness, 19 because that which is known about God is evident [m]within them; for God made it evident to them..” (Romans 1:18-19)
         1. Notice Paul states that God has given truths to men about God that is evident within them to such a point that they know the truth (19).
         2. Yet their sinful will goes against the truth in their mind when they “suppress the truth [l]in unrighteousness” (18).
         3. For their sinful will in suppression of truth Romans 1:18 reveal “the wrath of God is revealed from heaven” against such willful suppression.
      4. Man himself has become a slave to sin: “Jesus answered them, “Truly, truly, I say to you, everyone who commits sin is the slave of sin” (John 8:34)
      5. Thus, due to man’s sinful condition all of man’s faculty mentioned above (mind, will, behavior and emotions) one is not surprised the conclusion that a sinner will not seek God: “as it is written, ‘There is none righteous, not even one; 11 There is none who understands, There is none who seeks for God;’” (Romans 3:10-11)
         1. Note here that no one seeks God (11)
         2. This is in conjunction with the truth that people are not righteous.
         3. Are there any exceptions? Remember verse 10: “not even one”
      6. Implications towards marriage
         1. A Biblical view of sin means we should not idolize marriage.
            1. There is no such thing as a perfect marriage.
            2. That’s because there is no such thing as a perfect partner because all have sinned.
         2. A Biblical view of sin means we should re-orient how we see our problems in marriage.
            1. Our biggest problem is with God and not our spouse.
            2. Our problems are more than mistakes, simple error, etc., but willful sin towards God.
            3. Proof of this: Psalm 51:4= “Against You, You only, I have sinned And done what is evil in Your sight, So that You are justified when You speak And blameless when You judge.”
               1. Note the context in Hebrew verse 1 (English Prescript): “For the choir director. A Psalm of David, when Nathan the prophet came to him, after he had gone in to Bathsheba.”
               2. Yet while there were sins committed against others David saw the centrality of this as a sin against God first: “Against You, You only, I have sinned”
2. A Biblical view of sin means we understand that our sin separates us from God but eventually also separates us from each other in marriage.
   1. Put another way: Our vertical relationship affects our horizontal relationships.
   2. Proof: Sin makes people hide (Genesis 3:7-10)
      1. From each other (7)
      2. From God (8-10)
   3. A Biblical view of sin means we should realize the dangers to our marriage is internal, that is, within ourselves.
   4. A Biblical view of sin means we should be prone to believe the problems people say we have.
      1. That is because we believe that we have sins remain within us and to say we don’t have sins make out God to be a liar (1 John 1:8).
      2. That is because we know that people often see others’ sins more clearly than one’s own sins.
   5. A Biblical view of sin means we should recognize our remaining sins and pattern of sins and that we should mortify those sins.
      1. Proof of this: Colossians 3:5= “So put to death the sinful, earthly things lurking within you. Have nothing to do with sexual immorality, impurity, lust, and evil desires. Don’t be greedy, for a greedy person is an idolater, worshiping the things of this world.”
      2. Proof of this: Romans 8:13= “for if you are living according to the flesh, you must die; but if by the Spirit you are putting to death the deeds of the body, you will live.”
   6. A Biblical view of sin means we regularly appropriate God’s grace to fight sins.
      1. For instance: A Biblical view of sin means we regularly confess our sins in order for God to cleanse us (1 John 1:9).
      2. This session is largely foundational; next sessions we will explore appropriating God’s grace even more with the Gospel for marriage!